Looking For Angels

Posted: November 29, 2009 in Uncategorized

I just want to say a big old THANK YOU to all the people who took the time to read this. When I typed out the last entry I honest to god never thought anyone would have read those words. I posted the link to this on my facebook, myspace and YES, even twitter. When people commented on it, seeing their positive reactions to it surpirsed me.

I don’t see myself as some significant being who everyone pays attention to. When I posted it, all I was looking to do was start an idea. The fact that my friends took time to click on the link and read it, meant so much to me. I love you all and your encouraging feedback meant the world to me!

This isn’t really what I wanted to say in this entry, but I felt it needed to be said.

What I wanted to cover was actually what happened to me after I posted this blog.
How God used me to affect somebody’s life.

My first entry on this site wasn’t even up for a half hour when a friend of mine sent me a text thanking me for writting it, that it affected them. I felt glad to have been some help to them, with something as simple as a blog entry. They then began to tell me of a friend that they knew were injuring themselves and asked me what they could d oin order to help this person. I found myself being brutally honest with them. I said that were was no magic phrase you can say to get them to stop, that it took progress and their own will to be able to stop. I told my friend to just be there for their friend and support them through their struggles with cutting, and whatever they do D ONOT threaten to go tell a guidance councelor or parent. It’s seriously one of the worst things you could tell somebody who is struggling in this area. Having a threat brought their way could further push the person down in their depression and trigger the need to injure themselves.

Our conversation went on a little longer on how t ohelp this frined of theirs. I don’t know how it got to this point but I thank God it did, they then told me their own struggle with it and that when they read my post it made them break down in tears. That they have been waiting for somebody to step up and talk about this issue to the world. They then told me that they had been begging God to bring someone in their life that they could tell without that person judging them for their actions.

It didn’t really hit me until this afternoon as I sat down to write this, that I was that person god brought into their lives at the moment they needed it most. I never thought I was good enough in the eyes of God to EVER be used in such a significant way. That my words spoke into the heart of a friend and made them feel less lonely and more loved.

As Christians I think we don’t notice God using the things around us to help us overcome our obstacles. It says in the bible “We will overcome by the blood of the lamb and by the word of our testimony”. We yearn so badly for that Godly encounter that fixes everything all at once.

A few weeks ago at our Church, the guest speaker Judy Pucillo said that healing takes progress. You can be saved yet still hurting and lost. There are things God created us to use for healing. He didn’t create councelors and all this medicine for us to NOT use as resources. Last week Ted Haggard said something similar and that fact just stayed with me. We go around asking God for help in such weighed down areas of our life that sometimes we are too blind to see when He uses a more modest and more simple technique. Such as: an encouraging text from a friend saying they love you and are glad you’re in thier life. A blog that says all the right things you’ve been yearning to hear SOMEBODY say. Having loving and caring people come into your lifee when you have been feeling unloved and lonely.

God uses us I think more than we could ever imagine. I know when I realized that God had already began to use my voice in helping someone it sort of shocked me. I just sat and thought to myself “Wow ok so that was WAY cool!”. I thought it would be a year or two down the road that my voice and testimony would begin helping others, but it was literally within the hour I wrote my first entry, standing up and giving a voice to suicide, depression and self injury awareness.

We need to stop looking for the big flashy moments and start taking notice of the little moments that could seem to insignificant, and realizing that God is using us and also possibly healing us as well.

😀

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